“C’mere you fine ass bitch! Let me tell you a little story! I was in my room and I was just like staring at my computer thinking about everything, but then again I was thinking about nothing. And then my mom came in, and I didn’t even know she was there. She called my name and I didn’t hear her and then she started screaming “DB, DB!” And I go “what? Whats the matter?” She goes “whats the matter with you?” I go “theres nothing wrong, mom.” Shes all “don’t tell me that! You’re watching Ryoko!” I go “no mom I’m not watching Ryoko. I’m ok, I’m just waiting for subs of Mission E, you know? Why don’t you get me some subs?” She goes “No! You’re watching Ryoko!” I go “mom, I’m ok. I’m just waiting for subs.” She goes “No! You’re not waiting for subs, you’re watching and enjoying Ryoko! Normal people don’t enjoy Ryoko!” I go “mom, just get me some subs! Please, all I want is a subs!” And she wouldn’t give it to me! All I wanted was a sub, just one sub, and she wouldn’t give it to me! Just a sub!!!!”

Alright now we get serious. Mission E doesn’t look like it’s ever going to get subbed. Anal fecal matter like Ryoko gets subs, ass-adaptions by Bee Train get subs, shitty moeblob gets subbed as usual, but no one subs the coolest motherfuckers on the block. Well fuck you, subbers, I took three years of Japanese class and I’ve seen over 85 days of anime. It’s time to get RAW.

Most people would start off this review by talking about how Mission E is a sequel to the tired-ass trite called Code-e which you didn’t watch, and if you did, you hated it. Actually, that’s probably why this isn’t getting subbed – Code E sucked shriveled testicles, however Mission E is completely 100% nothing like it whatsoever in the slightest except in that it contains the main characters. Instead of a totally boring school love comedy, this show is more of a modern take on the 90s sci-fi cop duo shows a la Gunsmith Cats or Dirty Pair. As of episode 1, they haven’t quite caused the collateral damage that is absolutely necessary in these shows, however all signs point to it getting there quick. The girls have some badass weaponry besides their ancient art of whoopass and super fine asses (you didn’t hear that >_>).

Interestingly (mildly) this one pulls an R.O.D. on you where the older one is the ditz and the younger one is miss super-serious (actually, we were all comparing this girl to Yomiko Readman when Code e started, so it’s no surprise). Of course, I only understood enough of the dialog to figure out what was going on, but the dialog and, uh, plot was a total lost cause. But there were cool fights, cool weapons, and jazzy music, and that’s all I want out of my anime!